As we all know that men and women are very different from each other. They think different, they act different and they feel different too. Well, the fact remains that no matter how much men and women try they can not think in the same way and the difference in their thinking process reflects in their behavior.
So when it comes to relationships we can not expect that this rule will be broken and men and women will never think and behave similarly, thus making things easy and smooth for each other. For women it is a common problem to be clingy in relationships. Not that they intentionally cling to their husbands or boyfriends but their actions make them be or appear so.
Women are more emotional about relationships than men and the most obvious sign of that emotional attachment is concern. Women also have this tendency of being protective and controlling in relationships which are of course meant to be in the best interest of their partners. But this concern, protectiveness and control often tends to cross the limit making women become clingy.
As a result of this clinginess men feel disgusted and may even start drifting apart thus causing the relationship to end or become troubled. Therefore, it is important for women to learn how much of concern or affection they need to show to their partners and where to stop. If you want to know how to become a caring and ideal girlfriend and not a clingy one, then read on.
Give Enough Space and Freedom To your Boyfriend
One of the common mistakes women make is that they try to stick to their boyfriends all the time. Many women completely fail to understand why her boyfriend would even need to spend time with his friends or anybody else. If your boyfriend wants to spend time with his friends then let him do so. Men need this “guys out” time and they expect you to understand and support them for the same.
So do exactly what your boyfriend expects from you – give him his space. Let him enjoy his time with his own friends. He may even need to spend some time alone. Let him be alone for sometime without pestering him. Rather, you should try to encourage him to spend time with his friends and indulge in his hobbies and passion.
You too should spend time with your own friends and pursue your own interests or hobbies so that your mind is not always filled with one thought – Your Darling. All these do not mean that you two will not spend time together but it just means that you two should also live your individual lives.
Stop Interrogating Like Police
Your boyfriend is no criminal or a suspect of any criminal activity that you have to nail him down with questions as soon as you hear his voice over the phone or see him in person. There is nothing wrong in asking or enquiring about things but you must know and learn where to stop. Observe this rule especially when he is a bit down.
It may also be that your darling is looking or sounding low or worried and seeing him like that you obviously will not be able to stop yourself from enquiring about the problem. In fact, your asking him about the problem will convey to him how caring you are about him. But men are often not very comfortable at discussing everything immediately. If there is a problem then they prefer to think about the matter all by themselves first and then share it with their partners.
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So, if your boyfriend tells you about the problem on your asking then listen to him patiently and if possible provide him with a solution for the same. But if he does not want to talk about it, then instead of forcing or pestering him to tell you all just let him be by himself. Let him know that you will be there to hear him out and discuss the matter whenever he feels comfortable.
Limit your Calls and Messages
It is important to let your boyfriend know that he is important to you and you keep thinking about him. But calling him up every hour or texting him every 2 minutes is not quite the right way to get your message across to him.
Call him a couple of times during the day or let’s say 3-4 times within 24 hours (depends on how long you speak to him each time). If he is busy on any particular day, then decrease the number of calls for that day. The same rule applies for text messages too. If you can not resist the temptation to call him, then you can try to switch off your phone for sometime.
Don’t Make yourself Go Green with Jealousy
There will be girls (and quite possibly good looking ones) in his friends group, his workplace or his social circle. It can also be possible that he shares a good rapport with some of them. In such case it is important that you do not be jealous of the girl or girls and go green, red or rainbow colored with jealousy. Even if you feel a little pinch somewhere inside, do not let that show on your face or behavior.
Stop Being a Dictator
You should never ever try to set rules for your boyfriend or dictate to him what he is supposed to do and what he is not supposed to do. Remember you are his girlfriend. So there’s no need to play the role of his mother. As an adult or a grown up individual he knows what is right for him and what is not.
Keep negative thoughts at bay
Thoughts like what if he gets back to his ex, what if he meets and gets interested in someone prettier than you, his phone must be busy because he is talking to some girl, etc. are not only troublesome for your peace and tranquility but also harmful for the relationship. If he is in a relationship with you then you need to maintain that trust in him and confidence in yourself.
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